Validation - I am Where I Should Be

Since I can't really share this with anyone because I don't want to sound like a gloating jerk...I feel like I should write it down less I burst. I can deal with not sharing things with people as long as I can write it down somewhere.

You know those moments when you feel validated and know that you're doing what you should be doing? That. was. today.

Today, I went to the Bulgarian embassy with my colleagues and I had a legitimate conversation in BULGARIAN with the ambassador and some of the other diplomats. Here I am, 6 months into Bulgarian training (out of 8 months total of training) and talking about the refugee situation in Bulgaria with the ambassador of Bulgaria in BULGARIAN o___O

The other diplomats asked me if I ever went to Bulgaria which I proudly responded to with a no :)

They said that if I got another 6 months I'd be fluent. What an amazing compliment! It felt good to know all my hard work is paying off. I was OUT for two weeks at the beginning of language training because I had mononucleosis and yet, I am kicking ass! At one point they were worried I wouldn't pass my test, but NOW- they want to see if I can surpass my designated language score.

Can I do it? I hope so. I will certainly try.

P.S. one of the Bulgarian diplomats lived in Latin America and spoke awesome Spanish. Switching between Spanish and Bulgarian was interesting :D

As the Holidays are Approaching...

Както Коледа е близо...

It sure has been some time since I last posted. I think I probably have a lot more in my head than I am willing to write about or am able to remember to write. I finished graduate school May of this year. It was a worthwhile ride but I am happy that I am working again. Right after graduation from Columbia SIPA, Henry and I got married. The wedding was lovely and married life since then has been swell. Henry hasn't changed and this is good. I am happy to know I married the person I have grown to know for the past 9 years.

We did our honeymoon in Hawai'i which I have ALWAYS wanted to visit. Absolutely loved it and cannot wait to go back! We did a Samoan lu'au, we took  a helicopter tour of Oahu, and drove along the coast in a smart car. I saw some of the most beautiful views I have ever seen and had one of those moments where I honestly could not believe this is my life. All the hard work has paid off and I can enjoy the fruits of my labor! Then toward the end of our stay I got really sick and couldn't keep food down. Of course, everyone thought I was pregnant...hahaha. Alas, this was not the case! I was diagnosed with Gilbert's Syndrome. It's not deadly, but it does affect your quality of life until you are able to manage it. Like anything, this took time to do. I can now say it's about 80% under control. :)

I started work as an FSO in July. Orientation was insightful but more importantly, a time for me to get to know my incoming classmates/fellow officers. My particular class - the 173rd is very tight knit. All 74 of us are really like a family and I feel so blessed to have met these individuals. Everyone is so talented and has an interesting story. All of us speak at least two languages and I would say 75% of us came in with three (English being one of them). At the end of training I was assigned to Bulgaria! We are so excited and I feel very lucky to have gotten a country in a region that I have never visited (aside from my two week stint in Denmark for COP15, but that's Western Europe). Henry and I hope to do some traveling while there. I have two friends serving in Berlin who we want to visit and we hope to make a few weekend trips to Istanbul.

Bulgarian class is going well. I am supposed to reach a 2/2 in reading and speaking by mid April. I basically have to be able to interview people for visas IN Bulgarian by the time I depart to Post. I have 8 months to do this! Honestly, our FSO's are amazing. How is it that time and time again we meet these ludicrous expectations? I am not sure, but I can say that possibly motivation, our A-type personality and ambition has something to do with it. Some weeks are really tough but overall, it's been a worthwhile ride. Sometimes I worry ALL of this was a dream. I never thought while I was growing up in the South Bronx in a household where English was not spoken and with parents who only made it to the 5th grade that I would attend Columbia, let alone become a diplomat.

I guess we shall see what else is in store for me... :)

Happy holidays my dear friends!

Весела Коледа скъпи приятели!

Gratefulness: Reason #2

I had forgotten I meant to continue this act of writing down the things/people I am grateful for. Here goes:

Reason #2:

I am grateful for my fiance (aka soon to be husband) who, since we were teenagers always encouraged me and supported me, through the good, the bad and the ugly. He is someone who has been understanding when most people would not have been and who is constantly pushing me to challenge myself. He makes the unbearable, bearable. I love him from the bottom of my heart. I look forward to our life together!

The End is Just the Beginning

Have you ever had one of those moments where you can't believe that all your hardwork is finally paying off? I feel as though for the past 10 years I have just been working and working and now everything I had work towards is actually happening. While it would have been easier to handle these changes incrementally, I can't complain because I am grateful that I can finally reap what I have sown.

Let's Catch Up and a Lesson on Gratefulness

I certainly have not taken the time to update so I thought it wouldn't hurt to do so (what a good way to procrastinate). This semester is definitely a nice reprieve from the last three semesters I have had at Columbia SIPA. With a Monday -Wednesday schedule I am able to focus on wedding planning and this is a huge help! Last semester I could not focus on it at all and felt really tired. Of course, last year but especially last Fall was tough. My sister had gastric bypass surgery and had a difficult recovery. However, she was weighing over 360 pounds and it was becoming a health risk. Yet, we did not expect it to be such an uphill battle. At one point, she could not keep food nor drink down. I had to take her to the hospital to get an IV put in and I slept on those awful hospital chairs in order to watch over her. All the while I was dealing with mid terms and papers. Oh - and this happened right before Thanksgiving.

Our parents aren't living in the US right now so she really had no one else. Most of our extended family is full of hypocrites who talk behind your back and don't help you, but yet want to take credit when they see that despite this you have managed to become a successful person. Then, I got hit with more problems/worries. My mother's husband was diagnosed with terminal cancer. Currently, I have a feeling he won't make it till March as he can no longer eat. At least I was able to see him over winter break. However, this means that we need to consider funeral, burial and all costs associated with his inevitable passing.

Today, I had lunch as usual with my friend Sean and he gave me a great idea that may help me cope with all the things surrounding me that I cannot control. I should take the time to write one thing I am grateful for every day. Of course, it has to be different each time but this is an easy exercise that will assist me in brightening my outlook on life. Sometimes we get too swamped or overwhelmed that we forget to appreciate the good things in our lives.

Here goes:

I am grateful for: having a mother who despite lacking a childhood (worked since age 9) and any family support always loved me, encouraged me and never put me down.

I Love my Life!

After talking to a good friend today I realized that I need to set the record straight. Yes, initially Jakarta was shocking and at times overwhelming, but I love being here. I've fallen for Jakarta and HARD. Indonesia in general is fantastic. Life here is so different from back home. I enjoy what I do at work, I love the food, I am more fit and healthier (after I got the breathing issue under control it's been smooth sailing), I've made tons of friends and I am happy! Is it sad that I don't miss home? I really don't miss it at all. I know I am in the right career because I enjoy this lifestyle.  I have traveled to Singapore and other parts of Indonesia. Bali is next weekend, ah so excited!

I can't believe it took for me to go to the other side of the globe and to work for my government to realize how unhappy I was. Jakarta, you have opened my eyes to how wonderful life can truly be. I have done so many things here I didn't do back home and have experienced so many wonderful things. I did yoga for the first time here. I have a cook here who cooks me delicious and healthy meals. I've become very feminine and definitely enjoy shopping in a way I did not back home. I wear makeup and dress up. I have attained a self confidence that I didn't know I could possess. I've got my drive back and am constantly planning and working towards goals...I do not only feel like the old me but better than that - a new and improved me.

I love my life! I don't want to leave...

The Joys of Living in the Tropics and Working for the Gov't

So Jakarta continues to push my limits while the Embassy continues to support my growth as a professional. For the past few days I have been dealing with bed bugs and let me tell you, it is not fun. Luckily, there was a unit available and we were moved as soon as it was confirmed that we had them. It's been two days and things seem better, but I am still a little paranoid about the bugs. I expect that with time, the paranoia will ease.

Work has been intense as we get further into the summer and we are planning for July 4th celebrations. Also, a lot has to be taken into consideration for when Ramadan begins as it will affect many of our deadlines because people tend to not be around at this time. I am definitely looking forward to July 4th, live music, food and over 800 people - should be a good time!

Today, I went to a cocktail reception at the DCM's residence that was for young professionals at the Embassy (mainly those on their first or second tours). I was very happy to get to know more of my colleagues outside of work, especially those in other sections or cones. I also had the great privilege of meeting a mid-level management officer who was also part of the Pickering Fellowship when he was younger. The Pickering fellowship is more or less the sister program to the Rangel program that I am in. We hit it off right away and he asked me if I had a mentor. Well in my experience, it takes a village to raise a child and so I believe I have had various mentors throughout my life. Therefore, you can never have enough of them! So I most certainly took up his offer to be his mentee. I am excited to learn more from him and to see him in DC next summer when I start A-100.

Me and officer Clayton

Time to Embrace the Good as well as the Bad and the Ugly

Today, it was raining on my way out of the movie theater, which by the way costs THREE dollars a ticket. To an American this may sound like a bargain, but in Indonesia the divide between the rich and poor is truly GREAT as the average income in some places in Indo is 2 dollars a day. As I walked outside, there were these "umbrella boys" outside. These are poor boys who will lend you their umbrella for a donation while you catch a cab. They had no shoes on. Had tattered clothes on and were soaking wet. Some of them were middle school age while others looked like they were in high school. I felt so bad for them and I felt a pain in my chest that I hadn't felt for quite some time. I've tried hard not to let things like this affect me, but my parents didn't raise me to turn a blind eye to injustice. My parents know what poverty looks like as they grew up in it themselves. My mother for example grew up without a father and worked since she was 9 years old in order to help support her family. She had to drop out of school when she was in the 5th grade.

They all looked adorable. Maybe it's because they look so much like Nicaraguan children that I felt like adopting them or perhaps it was simply because these were living, breathing human beings. We gave them a dollar (which is more than most of them get as a "donation" per person. If they are lucky they can make approx. 4 dollars (about 40,000 rupiah) during rainy days. In Indo, that's lunch and dinner for some people.

I truly wish I could do more for these children. I'm actually thinking of volunteering a few weekends while I am here. I don't want to just enjoy the good and comfortable side of Indonesia. I want to embrace its ugly but most real side too.

I always think,

If I die, do I want to die without having given of myself to the world?

If I don't act and give,

Then what was my life worth?

Do I want to live my days in mediocrity?

First Weekend: Lady Gaga Look Alike Contest and More!

On Saturday, I went out for some Chinese which was tasty and afterward, went with my roommate to the club known as "Immigrant". It didn't really have a club feel as it was more like a lounge, the music super old (but good) and the drinks at NYC prices (now that's just crazy). Anyway, it was enjoyable but I don't think I will be coming back here. The upside was that the location had a great view of the city which was appreciated. Hopefully, I will be able to try out some other neat nightlife while I am here.

View of the city from top of "Immigrant" (blackberry vr)

On Sunday, I went with my roommate to EX which is connected to Plaza Indonesia. It has more entertainment related activities along with food. We happened to be there on the day that there was a Lady Gaga look alike contest which was interesting. It seemed to me like there were more young boys dressed in drag than there were girls and I found this amusing. Overall, very enjoyable to watch the Indonesians rock out to Lady Gaga songs. I am sure they will be unhappy when they find out that Lady Gaga cancelled her concert here. Aside from the contest, we also went bowling with others from the embassy and some of their friends. I was very bad at bowling but enjoyed it nonetheless. Something important to note is that I am feeling better health-wise and no longer have trouble breathing! I guess I will stay on this treatment until I go back home to the States.

 Gaga's" Little 'Indonesian' Monsters

Today, since it was a long weekend I decided to go shopping with one of the girls who I work with. We also had lunch with two other co-workers of ours at Sushi Tei. It was really fun to grab food from the conveyor belt not always sure of what one was picking. I think I may have done this once in the States, but if I did, it must have been a long time ago because I don't remember doing it. Overall, a fun first weekend in Jakarta! Can't wait for next weekend when I will be flying to Yogyakarta for the wedding of one of my friends and fellow Seeple, Gerri!

At Sushi Tei with Friends

Impressions

I have to quote NPOV wiki when describing my current impression of Jakarta because it describes it so nicely.

"Quite frankly, Jakarta is not an attractive city: a sweltering, steaming, heaving mass of people packed into a vast urban sprawl, the contrast between the obscene wealth of Indonesia's elite and the appalling poverty of the urban poor is incredible, with tinted-window BMWs turning left at the Gucci shop into muddy lanes full of begging street children and corrugated iron shacks. The city's traffic is in perpetual gridlock, its polluted air is matched only by the smells of burning garbage and open sewers, and safety is a concern especially at night. There are few sights to speak of and most visitors transit as quickly as possible."

I hope to see an improvement on this impression of this city in the coming weeks and as I near the end of my stay. If I am lucky, I may be able to join a trip on Saturday to see a bead-maker in the southern part of the city.

At least my job is demanding but interesting and this is helping me to keep a positive outlook. This trip is helping me to grow not just professionally, but as a person as well. It is definitely challenging me to push myself past my preconceived limitations.

Second Day at the Embassy: I’m Already on a Medical Treatment

Sunday night was one for the books. I seriously felt like I was dying. Yes, after walking for 20 minutes outside I was having an asthma attack and no, I am not sure how I made it until Monday morning. I seriously think my roommate Daniel saved my life. I thought I was going to faint and if it weren’t for his stoic nature and encouraging words I don’t know what would have happened. The pollution here really IS that bad. Hell, the sky is a constant grey! I am glad that if I was going to be here it was with the government. As soon as it was Monday morning I made my way to the health unit and was given an emergency inhaler and a steroids treatment along with some allergy meds. Today, I am still recovering and wearing a face mask whenever I go outside but definitely doing A LOT better.  To those reading this, if you have EVER suffered from asthma, think twice before you come to Jakarta, especially if you aren’t here with the government. You may not have access to adequate health facilities if you get sick. While in Jakarta the only walking I’ll be doing from now on is in the malls. Next time I bid on a post, I will consider the air quality as my top priority. I can deal with not having clean or running water or a possible political uprising but having trouble breathing is not one of them.

On a brighter note, the Embassy is fantastic. I am actually taking over someone’s JOB. Can’t go into the details of why, but while we wait on the replacement, who isn’t coming until the end of the summer, I am taking over. I work with a team of three Indonesians and they see me as their boss. This is really weird for me but kind of cool. They are also super sweet. They ordered me an air filter for our office and it’s coming tomorrow, yay! I also start language classes at the embassy next week so that I can be a better ninja (aka Indonesian look alike) since people talking to me in Indonesian and me not being able to respond is starting to get to me. The work that I am doing may seem boring to some people but I am enjoying it. It’s a lot of internal and logistical work – that’s all I can say. I am glad that I am hitting the ground running – in my case, jogging, because otherwise I’d be focusing on my sensitive but stable health condition and it would definitely not help my morale while here. I’m actually looking forward to going to Viet Nam at the end of my stay here - being able to get fresh air in Can Tho and to ride a bicycle sounds nice right now. Actually, there is a long weekend coming up and I am thinking of taking a train to anywhere outside Jakarta. I am desperate to be as far away from the smog as possible!

Lastly, I was supposed to have people install internet in our apt today and I was notified that they “overbooked us” and couldn’t come today. I don’t know when they are coming, so I will do my best to go to the internet café to update when I can. I also don’t have a working cell phone yet.  Hopefully, things will be settled by Friday and I’ll be more accessible then.

Well, “Welcome to Jakarta!”

First Day Fully Awake in Indonesia

My room, which was formally the study

Selamat Siang!

I came in yesterday at around 1:30pm Indonesia time. I met my boss Matilda at the airport. My initial impression of her is that she is super cool but will also demand good work, which is fine by me because that is what I am here to do! She is originally from Texas. Daniel the 2^nd intern was also on the same flight and I actually met him in Hong Kong while waiting for our flight to Jakarta. He goes to the University of Texas for graduate school. His bahasa Indonesian is really good. He lived in Indonesia for 5 years as a young child. In the coming weeks there will be 2 more interns joining us. Later that night, we were invited to eat dinner with Daniel’s boss Michael and his wife Anna (she is Filipina). It was a really nice restaurant and my meal was equivalent to 5 dollars and I had leftovers to take home for lunch! It’s such a pleasant thing to eat out so cheaply.

Today, Michael and Anna picked us up around 10am to go shopping for essentials. Daniel and I split the bill and we got a good amount of stuff for about 60 dollars each.  Also, Daniel and I have agreed to cook at least twice a week. Let’s see how that goes! By the way, I blend here very nicely! No one has asked me where I am from. So far, I of course have had people come up to me and just talk to me in Indonesian. And I of course look like a deer caught in headlights every time. Therefore, I’ve started to learn basic phrases and have had Daniel’s help with this. I’ve memorized greetings and how to say ‘I can’t speak Indonesian’ along with, ‘can you speak English?’ I was also able to find out more about the Management section’s culture and it seems so far that I have chosen the right “cone” for me. 

My colleague Daniel

They are the least formally dressed because they work mainly with FSNs and locals. They don’t normally meet with higher ranking officials and I am totally okay with this. Guess I won’t be using my suits very much. I am so glad I packed dresses too because apparently that is what most of the female employees in that section wear. Besides Matilda, I will be the only American in the housing section, the rest are Indonesian nationals. Also, I am the Housing Coordinator! Therefore, I will be helping FSO’s who come here for post with their living arrangements. I also asked about July 4^th celebrations and what the embassy normally does. Apparently, the Management section bears the brunt of the July 4^th celebration but I am okay with this too. There is a planning committee and I heard that those who deal with the food and beverages get to do food tasting at various caterers – I’ll see if I can join! Hee-hee

So excited to start my first day at the embassy tomorrow!

Sampai nanti,

E

1.5 Weeks Till Indonesia

Done with my first year at Columbia SIPA! One more year and I'll have that sweet masters degree.
I can't wait for Indonesia....so excited!!!
I hope I can hit up Bali, Yogyakarta,Singapore and Vietnam!
Life is awesome right now. All my hard work is paying off.
*does happy dance*

I've been wanting to update this for a while now, but it has been crazy busy at SIPA and it will be even worse as we approach the end of the semester.

Here's my remaining schedule:
April 3rd: My 25th birthday
April 6th: 2nd Econ exam
April 11th: Group budgeting project due
April 26th: Ethics paper due

April 30th - May 1st:  Comparative Development take home exam. Prof. gives people 48 hours to complete

May 2nd: Budgeting take home exam due

May 4th: 20 pg Evolution of Terrorism paper due and Econ exam same day

May 18th: Leave for Indonesia

La Unidad Latina Foundation - Undergraduate and Graduate Scholarships

Educational scholarships are awarded to Hispanic students on a competitive basis and range from $250 to $1000.
Applicants must:

• Undergraduate applicants must have a cumulative GPA of 2.80 – 3.60 out of a 4.0 GPA scale. Cumulative GPAs above 3.60 or below 2.80 do not qualify for a scholarship,
• Be currently enrolled in an eligible bachelor’s or master’s degree program at an accredited four-year college or university. Eligible degrees include: all Bachelor degrees, Master of Arts, Master of Science, Master of Public Administration/Policy, Master of Social Work, Master of Education, and Master of Divinity,
• Have completed at least one full-time year of study for undergraduate applicants, and at least one full-time semester of study for graduate applicants, and
• Reside in the United States.

Required Documentation:

• Official university-issued academic transcript(s) required and included in application. Graduate students are required to submit graduate and undergraduate transcripts.
• Letter of recommendation from university administrator/faculty or community leader demonstrating student leadership and commitment to civic service. (200-350 words).

Application Submission Requirements:

• Applications are only accepted within the 45-day period prior to the deadline. That is, as of January 1st for the February 15th deadline, and September 1st for the October 15th deadline,
• Applications must be postmarked by the deadline, and
• Do not send applications by registered mail or other delivery service requiring a signature (Fed Ex, UPS, USPS Express Mail, Airborne Express), as we are sometimes unavailable to sign for deliveries.
  
  Go here for the application: http://www.lulfoundation.org/Apply/tabid/60/Default.aspx

Summer Fellowship for Hispanic Undergraduates

Are you currently an undergraduate college student? 

Apply to CHCI's Summer Congressional Internship 

All program participants will receive an eight-week work experience on Capitol Hill and these great benefits:

• Stipend of $2,500 for the eight weeks in D.C.
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• Monthly Metro transit stipends
• Housing (all expenses paid by CHCI)
• Leadership development

This unmatched experience to learn first-hand about our nation’s legislative processes is available for college undergraduates enrolled full time in an academic institution.  Students of ALL majors that have an interest in the development of public policy and who have demonstrated leadership abilities should apply.

To learn more about the program, eligibility requirements, and how to possibly get credit for the internship, visit http://www.chci.org/internships/.

The CHCI Staff is here to assist you with your application, so contact us at CHCIapplications@chci.org or 1-800-EXCEL-DC with any questions.  You can apply to more than one of CHCI’s amazing programs at the same time.

*Current college seniors graduating in May 2012 are ineligible to apply; however they are eligible to apply for CHCI's Public Policy Fellowship program.  The application deadline for the Public Policy Fellowship is February 17, 2012.  Check the CHCI website for complete eligibility requirements and deadlines.

Arkh: A Genderqueer/Minority Focused Videogame

There are some wonderful people doing a great thing right now. They are working on a genderqueer/minority focused video game completely off the beaten path. If you are tired of minorities always being anything but secondary characters, and queer relationships being mocked and made fun of, this game will change all that. If you would like to learn more about what they are working on, please click here: http://thearkhproject.tumblr.com/

Also, feel free to chip in and help them reach their goals!

Cancun, Mexico

As a Spanish speaker I had a very interesting five days in Cancun. The things that people said under their breath in Spanish sometimes made me laugh while other times it just made me smirk. In the end, whether you speak Spanish or not, tourism is their livelihood and they will do their best to get those dolares out of you. Yet, the best part of it all, I would say is what I came for: fresh grouper fish, white sand and warm weather :)

Henry and I stayed at the Club Internacional de Cancun which is part of the Royal hotel chain. It was very spacious and quiet which we really appreciated. We went to the Hotel Zone but really didn't like it. It had a fake feeling, what with Starbucks and Versace stores being there. All these name brand stores and overpriced items...Some people may like that, but I for one don't. Therefore, we took the public bus everywhere to save money and to have a more real experience.


The buses are nice, clean and they run very often. If you are traveling on a budget I would recommend it (it costs less than a dollar per person) as it is not too difficult and there is only one main street if you stay in the areas where all the hotel chains are. However, if you know some Spanish, I would say to venture out into the city of Cancun where the real action is.

We got lost while trying to get to Plaza las Americas, the shopping center of the people of the city of Cancun. It was great because although we went in the opposite direction of where we wanted to go, we got to see how people interact with each other and how they live their lives. We knew we were somewhere completely different when a taco was one peso (where we were staying three tacos are 50 pesos) and the houses started to look a bit more worn down.

We also went on a catamaran party cruise sort of thing to Isla Mujeres and that was fun. People went snorkeling, although I personally didn't feel comfortable enough to do that. The snorkeling instructor toward the end also had everyone on the ship do tequila shots while he was dressed in very stereotypical Mexican garb. He was a hoot! Lastly, we went to the Royal Sands to their spa in order to end our vacation on a relaxing note. One word: Awesome. Well worth the money to do as the spa is affiliated but is not part of the hotel. The Sands also had a HUGE majestic pool that was quite a sight to behold.

First Semester - Done!

I wanted to update this blog more often but alas I was not very good about because of school. Until I came to Columbia you know, I never understood the meaning behind a vacation. After 2 weeks I usually wanted to go back to school and I didn't really ENJOY my breaks. For the first time in my life I can say, this is not the case. I have never been worked so hard in my life and I finally understand why people look forward to vacations! The day that I was done with finals I was in awe. I thought, "I'm really free?!" It felt good! Since Monday I have been seeing friends, sleeping late and going out. What a wonderful feeling!

So to update you on things that have happened. A lot has happened. Well something major. Henry's grandpa passed away last Monday. He was 87 but an awesome individual. He was a survivor of WWII. He was in the US Navy and he survived 5 days at sea when the USS Indianapolis was sunk by a Japanese submarine in the Pacific ocean. He was only 19 at the time. I suppose since that time he worked hard to live life to fullest, and that he did. He was a skier, a golfer, a sailor and a traveler. He shared 60 years of marriage with his wife Sandy before he passed away and had 3 children. I was very glad to have gotten to know him and to spend time with him these past 7 years. He was truly a great person and he will be dearly missed. RIP Donald.

Since Henry's grandfather passed away, there have been concerns regarding his grandmother. She has the early signs of dementia and she must be going through a really difficult time right now. Everyone was concerned about her living alone in her house but we don't want to put her in a home right away because enough change has taken place in a short period of time. Henry and I were asked a while back if we would consider living with her temporarily in the suburbs. After having a long and serious discussion, Henry and I agreed that it would be best and the right thing to do to live with her. We are the only ones who have the flexibility to do this and we really care about her so we are going to do it. It may not be the easiest commute for me to Columbia, but I will be living there for free with Henry and we will be helping a dear family member. As you may or may not know, family is VERY important to me and one of the things that I value the most. As messed up as my family may be at times, I could never leave them in their darkest hour if they needed me. Hence, why they tend to stress me, because I CARE.

Finally, there has also been talk of marriage. Henry's family has been sort of nudging and asking when he will propose. It's kind of crazy to think but he and I have been dating for 7 years and next year I will be 25. Wow, a quarter of a century old. Also, in the summer I will working in Indonesia! How exciting! Looking forward to the adventure that lies ahead. It'd be nice if he actually proposed before I left but everything in due time. I used to be really impatient when I was younger but I have learned the virtue of patience :)

There is a Light at the End of this Tunnel

Feeling a lot better. Things seem to be turning around and I am thankful for that. I am also feeling really fortunate for the friends I do have and for the support network that the Rangel fellows have given me. They have really been helpful at this time and I feel blessed to know that these people will be my future colleagues at the State department.

So on to happier news...I bought my mom's plane ticket and she will be going back to Nicaragua. I love my mom but this will be a huge load of my back. She is able to live a better quality of life in Nicaragua and as long as she is in NYC she will continue to be unhappy. I will not be able to support her if she stays in NYC. Plus, even though my step dad has colon cancer he is fighting and seems to be doing better. She will be with him and it will give her something to do while he is able to support her with his business. He isn't rich but they live modest but comfortable lives in Nicaragua.

My sister started her taxi driving job last week. I had given her startup money and it seems her hard work is paying off. She is finally making enough to pay her bills and she is in a much better mood. I feel relieved. I was able to have a candid and rational conversation with her and she really seems to be thinking about her future. We will be opening her first bank account next week and are looking EMT programs she can apply for next spring.

I am not sure if you know this but this semester I was an editing assistant and production assistant for the Journal of International Affairs at SIPA, a reputable and well known publication. This journal has gone to print and it looks beautiful. I felt really proud to have been a part of that and am looking forward to having a copy in my hands and seeing my name in it.

I am so glad to have made the friends that I have at SIPA. So far, since Friday I have been putting in between 3 to 4 hours everyday on Economics and things are starting to come together and to solidify. I am going to grab this Friday's econ exam by the balls and get that B average! I am not going to let my grade slip below a B in this class. Although I must profess that economics has gotten exponentially harder from the time that I took my last economics exam (there are three in the semester). I will make sure to reward myself by getting a drink after my exam with my 2nd year SIPA student/Rangel fellow Marissa who is just absolutely awesome and who I deem a great friend and my informal mentor.

Wish me luck! This weekend I will start working on the 20 page paper I have due in exactly one month's time. No worries though, I already started doing research for it. :)